Sunday, February 17, 2013

Some advice for candy lovers

There isn't a whole lot I can say before you read this except that it was not written by me. It was written by my life co-captain, Ryan.


After living with Scully for awhile now, it would seem to me that diabetes turns you into nothing more than a midnight candy junkie and a late night sweets freak constantly chasing the delirious high of an early morning low. This all leaves me wondering why she still bothers with this diabetes thing. Maybe it's belonging to a cool club like Connected in Motion but there are lots of other ways to make friends. Besides, who wants to be a member of a club that discriminates against someone just because they were born with a pancreas that's an over-achiever. Maybe a diabetics pancreas isn't lazy it's just that they aren't being challenged enough.

Lots of people have a sweet tooth but they don't need the crutch of diabetes to justify it. If sadomasochism is your thing then just break out the whips and chains already. That must surely be better than stabbing yourself with lancets and needles all the time. I know in this day and age of tech toys every one's always searching for the newest and coolest gadgets but is it really worth it just to have a nifty little pump attached to you like a cyborg? It's like those people that walk around with bluetooth ear pieces constantly glued to their heads yet never talking on the phone. I know it seems to LOOK cool but come on. Maybe diabetics should have just become math teachers as an outlet for their obsession with numbers.

I guess what I'm really trying to say is I just don't see the point in this diabetes thing. I keep telling  Scully that it's probably time she give it up. It's almost like she's hanging onto this thing for life or death. I'm sure it couldn't be any harder than quitting smoking or trying to lose weight. I see her struggling to make it work but it's like banging your head against the wall. Just a lot of pain that results in a big fat headache. Take me for example, a couple month ago I decided that I would start consuming green smoothies. It all sounded like a good idea, I mean there's all kinds of health benefits to it so why not give it a try? After several weeks of gagging down the vile concoctions it included a trip or two to the hospital with food poisoning from raw pumpkin seeds blended in. I decided it wasn't working for me, and quit. Easy right? Maybe it's that she doesn't want to be seen as a quitter, but no one ever looks down on the aforementioned smoker after they stop. I don't see the big deal in quitting something that just doesn't seem to be working for you. I mean what kind of insomniac sets an alarm to get up every few hours to play with their toys?

Maybe it's for bragging rights from the quarterly A1C contest they all seem to like so much. Sometimes my buddies and I would get together and see who could belch the longest. It doesn't require three months of daily testing and bizarre dietary practices to claim victory.

At the end of the day, I'm still no closer to an answer to why she clings so desperately to this addiction. I think there should be a "diabetics anonymous" 12-step program. It seems to work so well for other "diseases" such as alcoholism and drug abuse. I mean really, aren't these all in the same self destructive category? In the mean time I'll continue to try and talk some sense into her to make her see that choosing diabetes may not have been the best path for her in life. Hopefully one day she'll see the light and give up this ridiculous pass time.

5 comments:

  1. I graduated from belching contests to Diabetes, you just don't know the thrills and chills of an overnight low, You see them when Scully's having all the fun, but that's like the campfire bean scene in Blazing Saddles, so much better to be there, than in the theater.

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  2. Scully, Ryan's right. The "perks" of diabetes just aren't worth it. I know it's tough to quit cold-turkey, so I'll make you a deal: I'll do it with you. You and I can quit this thing together. And if you ever feel the need to shoot up or make your fingertips bleed, call me. I'll talk you out of it. :)

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  3. "I guess what I'm really trying to say is I just don't see the point in this diabetes thing. I keep telling Scully that it's probably time she give it up. It's almost like she's hanging onto this thing for life or death." <---SO TRUE.

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  4. "I know in this day and age of tech toys every one's always searching for the newest and coolest gadgets but is it really worth it just to have a nifty little pump attached to you like a cyborg? It's like those people that walk around with bluetooth ear pieces constantly glued to their heads yet never talking on the phone."

    Bwahahaha!

    ReplyDelete

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