Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Thwarted by injury

It's time to face the music.
That music is kind of dull and dreary. It's sad.

Here is a sad song to listen to while you read my sad story. For the record, this is Mogwai and I, personally, love Mogwai. It won't make you cry, I promise. Maybe the boredom of this post will.


The sad news, I am injured!

You may (or may not) have noticed my complaing here or there about the royal pain in my shoulder. My threats to just cut 'er off and get on with it. My shoulder now officially has a history.

Back in January at one of the best weekends of the past decade I was at Slipstream with my Connected in Motion peeps. We did a whole lotta playing in the snow that weekend. Lots of running and tubing and games. I woke up the final morning with a kinked neck. I assumed it was from the stellar bunkbeds we were sleeping in (*sarcasm*). 6 weeks later I could barely focus because of the pain. I went to my sports chiropractor (also CĂ©line's chiro). Upon initial inspection it was determined I did something to my pec minor. Weeks of torture and the pain was still hanging around a little too much. Life and location made it impossible for me to continue treatment. I left it by the wayside for awhile.

The pain continued and I think I kind of got used to it and didn't notice it as much any more because I'm a big fat stubborn donkey. Then it started to rear its ugly head again. I am lucky to have a friend who is an athletic therapist and offered to have a look at it. He tortured me big time. He kept asking my other friend who was in the room, "Is Scully a whiner?". He couldn't understand how it would hurt as much as it does. His final assessment was something with my left clavicle (collar bone). His torture actually left me a little less in pain for a whole couple days. Last night we did some further investigation and pin pointed the joint where the clavicle meets the sternum. We found loads of scar tissue and a clavicle that was somehow jammed and twisted and permanently... effed up.

I'm not sure where to go from here as far as treatment goes. He tells me I need to get mobility back into the joint and work on the scar tissue. It's going to take a long time and a lot of pain. My clavicle has found a new resting place and it will remain there forever. It means this is permanent and unfixable. All I can do is stay on top of it once I get it back to functioning order. Because of the compensation and the 7 months of irritation all the surrounding joints and muscles are also buggered.


But you know what? There are parts I have been in denial about. I've been awake most nights lately in pain. I spend a lot of time icing and medicating with pain meds. Running sidelines me for days and sometimes even brings me to tears mid run. Cycling sometimes too. It hurts like a mo'fo to drive. To sleep. To lay down. To stand up for too long. To carry a backpack. I've been doing some yoga lately and that easily wrecks it for days also.  There is no relief!!

It's time to admit that it is injured, bad. What's weird about that is that I have NO CLUE how I injured it. Nothing sticks out in my mind.

It's affecting my every day life because I'm always in pain and constantly sleep deprived. I'm favouring it because there is so much I CAN'T do now. Lifting heavy objects? nope. Holding my own bodyweight? not a chance. What's more? I am not keen on running any more because of it. It looks like I will likely be pulling out of the Twin Cities marathon I am signed up to run in a little more than 2 months. I'm behind on my training. I've cut runs short because of the stupid shoulder.

what gets me the most? It's not like I even use my shoulder to run or cycle, nor was it injured during either of these sports.

I am injured and I have to pull back on the training.

Sometimes admitting things is hard.

13 comments:

  1. Shoulder pain hurts. It hurts even when you think you're not using it.
    Maybe after some rest... it'll feel better.

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  2. Admitting things IS hard and injuries SUCK. I'm sorry that it's been so awful and really sorry that you have to pull out of Twin Cities.

    So what happens now? Pulling back on training might help but is there a recovery plan? Or will they have to just chop the damn thing off? Hopefully it's not too long before you're feeling better.

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  3. Coming from a person who is currently injured, it does suck. You'll hopefully find something that you can do in the meantime. Believe that you can and will get better. After this you'll appreciate and love cycling so much more.

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  4. Oh man Scully that really does suck! Sounds like the pain is pretty unbearable and I hope that some kind of recovery plan can be put together to get you back out there soon and healthy. From experience I know how much injuries suck, but it is worth the time to get healthy, as frustrating as it is. Healing vibes your way!

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  5. Too bad about your shoulder! Heal fast.

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  6. pain is no fun...super, massive, seriously effed up injury pain is even worse!
    hope you can find treatment and relief soon!!

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  7. Sorry about the injury, that sucks. Hope you get better soon

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  8. Take care of yourself! My husband's injury began with frozen shoulder...which caused his surrounding muscles to weaken and, eventually, lead to a minor back problem (an inflamed disc). Next thing you know, he wrecks on the bike, and we are now facing major surgery. Long story short, had he listened to his body back when it was merely a shoulder issue, he would be in a much better place now. Do what you need to do, and get back at it when you are in good order!

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  9. Oh Scully, I feel so bad that this has side lined you! I really hope there is a treatment that can help ease the pain you are in. You're a fighter and you haven't backed down from any obstacles...so you will get through this!!! Sending possitive thoughts your way...

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  10. damn scully, that sucks. hopefully things will improve. i know how much running and cycling means to you, so i'm sending healing vibes your way. do what you need to do (or the doctor says), get better soon, and stay positive. ((((hugs)))))

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  11. What a frustrating situation. I'm so sorry. This is not fair, and it just sucks.

    There has to be some light at the end of the tunnel somewhere. There has to be a way to get you back to enjoying the movement that has built who you are. There has to be help out there. Do not settle for anything less than the absolute best people you have access to. Time and patience are always in short supply in my head, and I'm sure you're probably much the same. But find the help. Somewhere. Somehow. Someway.

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  12. Oh crap, I'm so sorry to hear about your injury, that really sucks!! Try to take it easy and do everything your dr/physiotherapist etc says so that you can heal as fast as possible. R.I.C.E, does it, right?

    As hard as it sounds, try to hang in there :)

    ((hugs))

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  13. ouch! i'm sorry. :(

    i can't imagine how painful and frustrating this must be for you. hope you can find something that helps soon. <3

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