Tuesday, October 18, 2011

I shared some DOC love (and other stuff)

A day that is neither here nor there but everywhere.

I've been suffering from a massive migraine for 5 straight days with little relief.  It's migraine season for me though.  Every single fall when the weather takes a massive piss complete with crazy wind and rain is when I get it.  It comes and it often overstays it's welcome for weeks at a time.

I alternate between two kinds of pain killers but it doesn't take it away completely.  And if I forget to take another within about 3 hours then I'm kind of fucked.

Migraines SUCK DONKEY BALLS!  I've been unproductive, nauseous and almost feeling like I've got the flu. They are more than just a headache. I'm afraid to say it because I don't want to jinx it but I hope it lets up before the race.  







Enter my day:
I've been struggling for 4 days and here I am flying to Kansas City for work (blargh, and ouch). What could make a migraine worse? airports, recycled air, pressurized planes, long line ups and stress. 

Enter the middle cheery part:
While I was waiting at the Philadelphia airport for my connection I had a really nice experience.  I was sitting there playing games on my phone while two custodial airport staff were chit chatting near by.  Just as they were going their separate ways one of the women approached me and asked me about my infusion set (which is usually on my arms these days.) She recognized that it must have been an insulin pump and so starts the conversation.  Her daughter was diagnosed at 10yrs old just 5 months ago.  She was still beside herself and didn't hide the frustration she was feeling.  I commended her on her strength and sympathized with her sadness.  She had questions about how the pump helps me since her daughters' blood sugars are all over the place.  I resisted telling her how MY blood sugars are also all over the place but "control" isn't exactly a word that should be used in the same sentence with "diabetes".  Especially after only 5 months.  

I am not a pushy type and I NEVER get approached when I'm home in Canada. So I was trying not to jump up and down rhyming off websites. She got a bit choked up and didn't seem too keen on having a heart to heart with a stranger.  I could have talked forever! I made sure to tell her about how huge the diabetic online community is and I highly recommended she seek some support online.  I told her that there is a HUGE world of Mom's of T1's out there. 

It's so hard to draw the line between being informative but not pushy. She said that she hopes her daughter will have a normal life. It was at that moment I told her that next week I'm running my first marathon. I said it with a big smile on my face and you'd have to be blind to not sense the excitement in my voice. That tidbit of information brought a smile to her face. Then she got even more choked up. She thanked me for giving her hope for her daughter.

I look back though on how much that woman changed my day. I wanted to run back to her and hug her! but that would be creepy and weird. She will get it one day. I do wish I had rhymed off some websites for her and written them down. More than that I should have at least gotten her email.

I also want to thank all those T1 mamas out there because without knowing you and interacting with you I wouldn't have been able to empathize with this woman as much as I did.

Enter the evening:
I arrive in Kansas City after a gut wrenching and tummy twisting flight. Near the end as I could see land I was secretly praying to my non-existent god that we didn't hit any more turbulence. I thought I was going to lose my lunch. By this point there was so much pressure inside my noggin I could swear my eyes were going to pop out of my skull. The pain killers were deep inside my carry-on. 

OMG I was in a royal amount of pain. And just like business trips often go, I had less than an hour to get showered and dolled up for an evening gala event at a fancy museum.  Two words come to mind. Fuck Me. And in a FML and kill me now sort of way, not a sexy way. I couldn't believe that when I landed the weather was just as cold and rainy as it has been at home for the past few days.  Ergo more fuel for my persistent and now ferocious migraine. 

Oh and now, forget laying down in the dark. No, it's fancy shoes that KILL my feet and a dress with all the fixings to just piss me off. PLEASE pain meds, start working NOW! All I wanted to do was hide in the dark.

I so totally dislike small talk, networking and business. Not to mention the big fancy dinner that I couldn't really eat because of the wheat and meat. I was glad that the migraine was making me nauseous. 

Once all the pain meds started kicking in I was starting to cheer up and so my smiles were not fake. I did meet some very nice people and had some interesting conversations. I had a good laugh when it came time to diving down the cleavage of my dress to retrieve my pump. I got a couple weird looks and naturally, my blunt ass blurted out, "And here comes the embarrassing part of the evening." The women at the table laughed, the men, well they had no idea what was going on and I'm okay with that.

I don't change my personality even if I'm around professionals. If anything, I try to make it humorous. I am who I am and I don't like changing that.

So this was an interesting down up down up kind of day.  

Oh looky here, it's time for more pain meds.  What was it? Oh yeah, FML!

I'm sorry for this post, it's pretty fucked up.

5 comments:

  1. Oh, Scully, I hope the pressure inside your skully goes down. It's good to know that even when you're writing FML! posts, you still have a good sense of humor.

    And doesn't the KC airport look like a Soviet apartment building and the Death Star had an ill-begotten love child?

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  2. hope you're feeling better today. migraines are a bitch!
    i still get a little choked up when i hear about another child being diagnosed with this pain in the ass. i hope her mom takes your advice and finds some online help or better yet, other children for her daughter to interact with. feeling like you're the only one really, really sucks. 8(

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  3. A Shitty Poem and even Crappier Rap

    'Twas 1:45 before i checked your Blog
    and to my surprise you WROTE! even thru your fog
    an interesting day of ups and downs
    and on reflection, seems more smiles than frowns
    when i hear "Kansas City" i think of a song
    i'd sing it to you...could that be more wrong?
    hope you're feeling better
    you diabetic jet-setter
    think i'll get back to work
    hope you don't think me a jerk!
    truth is... i love reading all of your words
    d'ya think something rhymes better than turds?
    well in closing...i just wanna say:
    superstitions be damned and migraine be GONE!
    this D-gal's a runner!...in the NF MARATHON!

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  4. i love that you shared the DOL love.

    I hate that another little kid has diabetes and another mom is scared.

    I love that you pulled your pump out from your cleavage and I love your comment as you did it. Go girl!

    I hate that your head has been pounding forever.

    I love that you are running a marathon in five days and that the fact you are running a marathon probably inspired a mom in Philadelphia.

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  5. OMG Everything Celine said! LOL the pump out of your cleavage bit...hehehe that's actually something I miss about having a pump-all the fun jokes I could conger up when pulling the pump out of that spot. My favorite is "This is the new thing ya'll, it makes your boobs bigger without surgery! Just a few little pushes of a button and voila!" Anyway, hang in there. Migraines suck big time. I hope yours go away now! Sheesh, as if the diabetes wasn't enough. And I've always heard travelling by plane makes them worse :( Anyway, loved this post. I don't know why but I enjoy reading up and down posts.

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